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Unrealized mutual baby crushes gone bad. But, I was a good girlfriend, and it never occurred to me to glance around and see what else was going on in the world. And that’s good. You can’t regret that. You can’t regret being a decent, faithful, honest person even it it later blows up in your face. What’s weird is when you have a break up like that, it’s not just the past that disappears, it’s the future, too. I never obsessively plotted out, “OK, we’ll have 2.5 kids, and then we’ll get a golden retriever and you’ll be a lawyer and I’ll join the Rotary and we’ll ski in Vermont for [...] It took a long time to draw all those little squares. I actually remembered this as being dirtier than it is, which just tells me that I drop the f-bomb exponentially more often than I did 10 years ago… The lesson here is not to get yourself all bent out of shape about trivial crap. No one was asking me to act so lame, or suggesting it, I acted lame and wasted my life all on my own, because I thought that’s what being a good girlfriend should be. I never, once, in four [...] The whole “Men are dogs” has become more cliche since I wrote this. But I was actually thinking about “If A Man Answers” – a Sandra Dee movie where she buys a dog training manual to teach her husband how to behave. It’s pretty good until the husband finds the book. |
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